How Shadow and Rouge fails
by hitsrin
Summary: This is a collection of stories describe how Shadow and Rouge can fail at doing normal things.  Rated T because Shadow and Amy likes to curse
1. Day 1: Fanfiction

**Authors Note: This story is based on a conversation between me and a friend of mine. In this story Shadow's a girl. Enjoy.**

The day Team Dark tried to write fanfiction.

It all started one day in Team Dark's apartment on the second floor in an apartment-complex in Station Square. Rouge and Shadow was bored so they sent Omega out to get milkshakes.

Shadow: How about we try to write fan fiction?

Rouge: That sounds like a good idea! I have a few ideas.

Shadow: No you don't.

Rouge: Yes I do!

Shadow: No you don't.

Rouge: Yes I do!

Shadow: No you don't!

Rouge: I wonder when Omega will come back with our milkshakes.

Shadow: I hope it's good milkshakes. Last time I ordered milkshakes from McDonalds I wanted chocolate but got half chocolate half vanilla!

Rouge: Yeah, yeah just calm down.

Shadow: I don't want to calm down! I want my milkshake! And a cupcake.

*Amy comes in*

Amy: Yeah, and I want to fuck Sonic. If she get's a cupcake I get to fuck Sonics brain out.

Shadow: I will get my cupcake!

Amy: *holds up her middle-finger at Shadow* Yeah, right! Not in a million years!

Shadow and Amy starts fighting.

Rouge: Stop fighting you idiots! Or I'll shoot your brains out.

Shadow: I'm not an idiot. She is.

Amy: I want ice-cream.

Shadow: *points out the window* Look, it's faker.

Amy: WHERE?

Shadow: Down on the street.

Amy: *Jumps out the window* SONIIIC!

Shadow: I hope she dies.

Rouge: Me too. She gives girls a bad reputation. *types something on the computer*

Shadow: *looks at the computer* Who the hell taught you to spell? Knuckles?

Rouge: No, I teached myself.

Shadow: Was it fun living in the cake?

Rouge: *tries hard not to laugh* What do you mean "living in the cake"? *cracks*

Shadow: I meant the cave! Gah! I need a milkshake. And a cupcake. And pickles.

Rouge: What the hell? Pickles? Do you even like pickles?

Shadow: No. I don't. Actually, I hate pickles. I've hated them ever since the day I was forced to taste them.

Rouge: Aw, poor you.

Shadow: Yeah, poor me. *Zones out*

Omega comes into the apartment.

Omega: I brought your milkshakes.

Rouge: Thanks. Could you be a sweetie and get a cupcake for Shadie?

Shadow: *Doesn't react*

Rouge: Oh god, not another flashback.

God: Yes, another flashback. I just love to mess with him. Her. Him? Her, definitely her.

Rouge: Gee, thanks pal! How I love you! I want cake.

Amy: Yeah, she wants cake and I want to tongue-kiss with Sonic but it wont happen.

Rouge: I WILL get cake. There is some in the fridge.

Shadow: *snaps out of flashback* Amy, where the hell did you come from?

Amy: I came from God. Thank you god!

God: You are very welcome Amy. I love you.

Shadow: I. Hate. God.

God: I don't hate you Shadow. I just love to mess with you.

Rouge: *laughs at Shadow*

**A/N: Hi, It's me, hitsrin, please, read and review, tell me what you think.**


	2. Day 2: Dinner fails

**Authors note: Hi everyone, hitsrin here with the second chapter of How Shadow and Rouge Fails. In this we take a closer look at dinnertime at Team Dark's apartment.**

Day 2: Dinner fails

Rouge comes home after having done some shopping. Shadow is in the kitchen cooking dinner.

Shadow: Rouge? I need your help, please!

Rouge: What is it?

Shadow: Is it possible to burn salad?

Rouge: No, it's as good as impossible.

Shadow: Then I can do the impossible.

Rouge: What do you mean?

Shadow: I burned the salad. And the milk.

Rouge comes into the kitchen. The countertops are black, the walls are nearly completely black but the stove and oven is untouched.

Rouge: What the hell happened in here? And how the fuck can you burn milk?

Shadow: Like this. *pour milk into the glass and then put the milk away. As soon as she touches the glass the milk turns on fire* Like that.

Rouge: What the fuck? …. Oh well, seems like sushi or McDonalds again tonight.

Shadow: Yay! Sushi!

Rouge: Riiiiight….. You need some clothes. Remember, you're a female now. Come on, I have something that might fit you.

Shadow: Just, no dresses please!

Rouge: If I've got something else you can wear that.

They end up choosing a white t-shirt, a red mini-skirt, deep-blue knee-socks and a pair of sneakers.

Shadow: I hate skirts.

Rouge: You can hate them as much as you want, just behave while we're out.

They go downtown and enters a random McDonalds.

Random kid: Look mom, look! That woman's boobs are huge!

Rouge: MY BOOBS ARE NOT HUGE! *charges at the kid*

Shadow: And you told me to behave? *holds Rouge back*

Random kid's mother: Please darling don't talk about the lady like that. Her breasts may be big but they are probably not real.

Rouge: MY BOOBS ARE VERY REAL!

Random person working at McDonalds: Please miss, if you continue acting like that I will have to ask you to leave:

Shadow: We are very sorry. We're leaving now.

*ten minutes later outside*

Shadow: And you told me to behave?

Rouge: Fuck you.

Shadow: I'm just gonna go get some sushi and then we go home, ok?

Rouge: Okay.

Shadow goes to pick up some sushi but runs into Sonic. Literally.

Shadow: Oomph! *falls on her ass*

Sonic: Oh, sorry beautiful. I didn't see you. Are you hurt?

Shadow: No, I'm fine. *gets helped up* Get your hands off me!

Sonic: Sorry babe! *let's go of Shadow* Is it just me or is it hot out here?

Shadow: Go fuck yourself Faker. *enters the sushi shop*

Sonic: Was that Shadow?… Nah! *goes home*

*inside the sushi shop*

Shop worker: Can I help you?

Shadow: I just want a big sushi box.

Shop worker: Of course. Anything else?

Shadow: No thanks. *Pays and leaves shop*

Rouge: *is leaning up against the wall of the shop* Did you get our dinner?

Shadow: Of course. Let's go home before we run into Faker again.

Rouge: You met Sonic?

Shadow: Yeah.. He tried to get into my… Well, I can't say pants 'cuz' I'm not wearing pants.

Rouge: You're not wearing panties?

Shadow: No, why should I?

Rouge: Because! You're a girl!

Shadow: I'm a girl? *Looks down herself* Oh, right…. Ehm… Awkward..!

**A/N Hi everyone, again, please read and review!**


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